A famous stoic Seneca once said; “He is most powerful who has power over himself.” What does this mean? I would suggest that what Seneca was saying is that you are your own worst enemy or biggest friend and that what others say and do matters little but what matters more is how you respond and what you say and do. Evidence suggests that will power and self-control are necessary for a happy and successful life.
A well known experiment on self-control is called the “Marshmallow Experiment” which was conducted in the 1960s. The experiment tested the self-control of 4 year olds. They could either have a marshmallow immediately or they would get two marshmallows if they waited 15 minutes. The researchers than tracked each of the 4 years olds into adulthood. They discovered that the children that were capable of delaying the immediate gratification of the single marshmallow and waited and received the two marshmallows were more successful in life. They did better in academics, health, and relationships. The experiment concluded that the ability to delay gratification constituted “a protective buffer against the development of all kinds of vulnerabilities later in life.”
Other similar studies have found that childhood self-control predicted physical health, substance dependence, personal finances, and criminality. This was even found to be true when other factors such as intelligence and social economic status were factored in. Poor self-control equates to less success in life.
So OK your one of those kids who would have eaten that first marshmallow what do you do to help strengthen you will power to make positive changes in your life. Will power, self-control can be exercised and can be improved much like exercising a muscle builds strength. So contemplate what you want to work on. If you want to improve your diet than pick one thing that you want to do such as eating more vegetables. I wouldn’t suggest making wholesale changes but just for example say you are going to eat 2 more servings of vegetables a day, plan for a start day, prepare and do it. Don’t take anything away just add the vegetables to the day. Do that for awhile and be mindful about when you are doing it and celebrate your successes. Then after a couple of weeks build upon that success. But again be mindful about what you are doing and why you are doing it. Do the same with exercise, build that will power by taking a thoughtful first step such as taking a walk after dinner everyday, or going to the gym just 1 day this week and do a short resistance training workout. Make it part of your routine and recognize that you are building your self-control while you are doing it. Sure there will be excuses and but don’t let that be an excuse to stop. Seneca said, to be the most powerful you have to have power over yourself, recognize you hold the power over yourself and especially how you respond when you are not perfect. It is OK not to be perfect but it is not OK to excuse your way out of being in charge of your life. You are powerful when you choose to exercise your will power. You can contact me at [email protected]