Frustrated is a term that I often don’t use because I rarely feel frustrated. I exercise religiously, I intermittent fast and watch my diet closely so I believe that I am doing all I can to maintain my health. Thus I feel in control of my health. I acknowledge that I can only do so much and that I of course will suffer the consequences of aging like everyone else but I believe that by doing what I can to control the negative inputs I will get better outcomes. Death is coming for all of us but fragility is not a certainty. So I do all I can to maintain strength, endurance and vibrant health. But, I am currently getting a lesson in the old Yiddish proverb, “We plan, God laughs.”
Late in June I visited my 3 year old grandson as I normally do each week. Usually he is a bundle of energy and will rarely sit long enough even to eat lunch. This visit was different because he didn’t want to run around he just want me to play a video game on his tablet with him. He had a runny nose and a slight cough but no fever. He was subsequently taken to the doctor and diagnosed with a virus and had a negative covid test. Two days later I came down with some sinus congestion and a minor cough. No big deal I caught the virus, I will be good in a couple days. Two weeks later I end up at my doctors office as the symptoms had not cleared and had in fact gotten slightly worse. An antibiotic was thought to be the solution as there was a concern that this had morphed into a bacterial infection. A little history I have rarely taken antibiotics in my adult life. Maybe 3 times, the most serious when at age 35 I got a serious and strange pneumonia that landed me in hospital and nearly did me in. I took months to recover but have had no serious illness for the next 30 years. That illness still haunts me and I get anxious every time I get a cold with a cough as I have distinct memories of that harrowing time of my life. So I willingly took an antibiotic for the next 7 days. Day 5 of the antibiotic treatment I was much better. Days 6-7 I thought I am over this and I’m back to good health. Two days later the illness came roaring back and I was sicker than I had been at the start of the antibiotics. I thought oh well this sucks but no big deal. Frustration is building as my workouts have faded into almost being none existent. My sleep is greatly impaired and I don’t feel like this is going in the right direction. Meanwhile my grandson has been back to the doctor twice still it is considered a virus with no antibiotics prescribed. My, physicians office has a Nurse practioner system and there is no way I can get in to see the doctor. I am not able to schedule an office visit but the nurse decides through phone calls that a stronger broad spectrum antibiotic is necessary. I make the mistake of looking up the side effects of the antibiotic prescribed and oh my I can’t take it. Four days later am I worse than ever. Frustration, Frustration, Frustration- just get better. Yeah I know its not cancer or it could be a lot worse but obviously I don’t do “sick” well.