Health

I have been healthy all of my life. I never fully understood what having a health related problem meant. I took my good health for granted. I took care of myself by trying to eat right, exercise, and I avoided smoking and excess alcohol. But, I never fully valued my good health because it was what I had grown accustomed to. Sure, I got sick sometimes, the flu and cold, once a bad case of food poisoning but all of these were minor blips in my regular good health that I quickly got over. I did once have pneumonia that landed my in the hospital for a week and took 3 months to recover from. I was in my mid 30s and just took it for some bad luck that was an anomaly and I soon put it behind me. Now in my late 60s I’m struggling to recover from prostrate surgery. I am improving but it has been weeks now moving into months and I obsess over everything and can’t accept the slow pace of recovery. One day I feel better only for some unknown reason the next day it there is a set back. The slow grind of the day to day with no leaps of improvement are difficult to process. I have always quickly overcome health difficulties. While I know I am getting better the anticipation and overwhelming desire to get back to normal is maddening. The lack of feeling good and happiness that that brings is hollowed out by the realization that today will not be the day normal returns. Nothing to do but breath deep and try and make the best of the unwanted situation. What this health situation has done is highlight what good health means and how valuable it is. I will never take health for granted again. I got a glimpse of what old age and frailty might look like. I have experienced some of the physical decline associated with aging but I have always been able to partially accommodate and overcome the aging shortcomings to my satisfaction. What I have learned is that the decline can be sudden and steep with no path to remedy the results. This becomes a threat to mental health as reality sets in to what the new normal may be. Moving forward I will celebrate each day of wellness and try and accept any setbacks with the goal of full recovery. What I will also do is have empathy for those that are ill or are suffering from chronic health problems. I have found that while some aspects of health can be linked back to chosen lifestyle some aspects are not able to be controlled. Some health is lifestyle some is good genes and some is just luck. I very much respect those people that struggle with long term health problems and now can empathize with their problem.